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Posts tagged toddler behaviour

Why is everything with my child such a battle?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. This is a very common question that lots of parents ask. These battles are in relation to everyday things such as getting them to clean their teeth, put their shoes on etc. as well as things like not wanting to go to certain places or just refusing to be cooperative in general!

The first thing we need to do in these situations is to look at what’s happening from their perspective; they are on their agenda and we are on ours, but neither party is considering the other. If your little one thinks that they are doing one thing and you think they need to be doing another, this can trigger a big outburst but also frustration from both sides. This is completely natural – think about how often, when we are told not to do something / how to do something or continually instructed to do things, we might get annoyed, frustrated and ultimately resistant to doing what we are being asked to do.

Why does my child keep interrupting me?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Do you have a toddler or an older child who, every time you are speaking with other adults on the phone or in person, or even to your other children, continually interrupts you or generally doesn’t let you speak to anyone else?

This can be a very common situation and can lead to frustration from both sides when it is happening frequently. However, we also need to keep in mind that this can be a skill which even some adults can struggle with ;-).

BehaviourRebekah Frankcom23 June 2021parenting, families, parenting tips, top tips, frustration, keep calm, attention needing, attention, why does my child keep interrupting me, interrupting kids, egocentric children, role model, behaviour, behaviour and emotions, toddler behaviour, kids behaviour, children's behaviour

My child only wants me!

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Our children can be very set on things at times and this can even be in relation to wanting one parent to do everything for them and to be with them all the time. We can often find in these situations that we have one parent who seems to be favoured over the other.

This behaviour can be extremely draining for the ‘preferred’ parent at the time and can be very difficult (and upsetting at times) for the other parent (the ‘rejected’ one) who feels that they are not wanted or, sometimes, not even liked or loved.

We must remember that this is not about who your child does or doesn’t like, it is all about your child learning and developing, which includes learning what relationships feel like and how to manage them. They are practicing something that they will have to deal with for years to come through friendships, relationships and also with work colleagues. It is all about making sense of how and why we feel what we do!

Why does my child’s behaviour change when they have been on a screen?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. As I am writing this blog we are in lockdown 3.0 - back to home schooling and trying to come up with ways to keep our children entertained all day long! Even before lockdown I think we were all coming to accept that screens are a part of our everyday lives. They aren’t going anywhere, and I think we would all agree that they’ve been really valuable through lockdown in keeping us all connected with friends, family and with work or school.

How do you make co-parenting work?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Co-parenting or shared parenting are terms used when two people who have been in a relationship, have had children together but then separated. The important thing to remember about co-parenting is that you don’t stop being a parent, you just stop being in a relationship with the person that you have had children with. You both still have a responsibility to your children to provide them with a stable and secure environment in which they can grow and develop.

Why does my child head bang?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. In recent weeks this is a question that I have been asked several times and so I thought that I would write a blog on the topic! Headbanging is a behaviour which often causes adults great distress - seeing a child repeatedly banging their head is very hard to watch and to understand.

Why doesn’t my toddler like their new sibling?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. Introducing a new baby to a family is something that we all hope will be like we see on TV, arriving home with the other children who are so excited waiting to welcome their new brother or sister into the family. However, for some families this picture of family bliss is not always what happens. In my time working with families, I have experienced children asking when the baby is going back to the hospital, suggesting that the baby is sent back where it came from and I’ve even seen one little one pulling the bin over to his mummy and telling her to put the baby in it because he didn’t like him!

Do reward charts work?

Written by Claire Burgess, Family Consultant. When looking at behaviour related issues, one of the most common strategies or ideas that is given as a solution is a reward system of some kind. This might be a reward chart, a star chart, marbles or pasta in a jar (etc.) - these are all related to encouraging ‘good behaviour’ and, in some situations, these might work.

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